Monday 30 June 2008

Hello Lady, you want Tuk Tuk?


After 4 days though of dust and dirt we feel the need to move on, so get on a bus back to the main road. Once the bus gets there, we disembark for a lunch stop - and the bus disappears. It doesn't come back for nearly two hours. Just when we're assuming that all our possessions have been sold in the local market by now, the bus reappears.Turns out 4 of the tyres burst thanks to the condition of the road, and they need to be replaced before we continue. Which would explain why we paid such a large fare for the trip. (All of $12.)
Since then we've toured the wonders of Angkor Wat, seen the Killing Fields in Phnom Penh and visited the best wildlife park either of us has ever been to. Cambodia is truly a country of enormous wealth and poverty, mixed together with an immense sense of humour, patience and determination. Everyone we speak to has personal stories of great tragedy and/or deprivation, countenanced with an astonishing drive to imrpove their situation. For example our tuk-tuk driver in Siem Reap who made no profit at all in taking us from the bus to our guesthouse, but could only hope that we would agree to take him on as our driver for the temples. Fortunately, we did, and discovered (on the second day and after much questioning) that he has to pay a monthly fee to get access to the bus station, which far outweighs any fare he can charge the tourists he picks up there. Sometimes they take him on as a driver; more often they don't - but still, it's worth it for the cash he can make on those few occasions. That cash sometimes gets spent on beer and karaoke, but is usually sent home to help raise his son, who is being taken care of by his parents, or ploughed into English tuition so that he can achieve his real ambition which is to beome a professional tour guide and operator. We heartily wish him well.

In Phnom Penh we have a similar experience with our tuk-tuk driver there - he has 2 small children and his wife is no longer working. When she did, she earned $60 a month. So he is the sole breadwinner and ecstatic when we employ him for the day to ferry us around various points in the city, after he took us from the bus to the guesthouse. He's very good company around the capital and joins us for lunch to try "your western food" but ends up having a khmer curry (better than the sandwiches on offer anyway).

Tommy Sheridan look-a-like contest


Our introduction to Cambodia wasn't a good one. It was kick started with an unhealthy dose of traveling sickness - runny runny poos (very runny indeed) that lasted for the next 2 days. Our destination after crossing the Laos / Cambodian border was the remote North-Eastern province of Ratanakiri and the town of Ban Lung. To get there we had to travel for four hours over the bumpiest dustiest orange dirt track. Being afraid to fart for four hours isn't nice, I can't say I enjoyed the journey. On arrival, we found a guesthouse and went straight to bed. Nothing much happened for the next day and a half. We played tag team for use of the toilet seat, I was sick a lot, we drank lots of fizzy juice and we entertained ourselves by listening to the rats scratch and scurry behind the walls of our room.
When we finally surface, we couldn't wait to get our toes dirty and begin our experience of Cambodia for real. In this part of the world you get more than your toes dirty. Is there life on Mars? Maybe. But Mars is here on Earth in the North of Cambodia. We hired a moped for the day and within 10 mins we were covered in thick orange dust from the road. Every time a large truck passed by it would fling another batch of thick dust into your face. It gets everywhere, up your nose, in your ears, between your toes and leaves you, fake tanned all over, looking like a contestant for a Tommy Sheridan look-a-like contest. And the beard! After we left the area I was still wiping orange muck from the beard 3 days after we left the area. Needless to say, we loved our time in Ban Lung!
We swam in the most beautiful and serene lake that is in the middle of an old volcanic crater. It is perfectly round, perfectly warm and perfectly clean. Why can't Loch Lomond be more like that?! In the evening, just before sunset, the lake was busy with monks, local families, tourists and Cambodians from Phnom Penh all enjoying the cool, cleansing water.
The next day we hired a local guide, a young man called Terry, who took us out on a tour of some of the Laos and Chinese villages that are in the area. He is an agricultural expert who received a scholarship to help attain his degree from Phnom Penh University. He now works for a German NGO called 'German Agro' (which sounds more like a violent faction of German football hooligans) and is passionate about staying in his home province and helping local farmers to make the most of their farms and crops. He took us to an amazing fruit tree farm where we saw bananas, pineapples, limes, oranges, rambutans, lychees, guava, jackfruit, durien and black pepper trees. He was astonished to hear that we had never seen a pepper tree before, nor had we tasted jackfruit or durien. But then he had never seen snow before. 'Same same but different', as they say round these parts. We tried durien and jackfruit for the first time. Durien is expensive as it takes 8 years for the first fruit to be ready from a new tree. It is also known as stinky fruit and although greatly loved and prized by locals, it has an aquired taste for more Western palates. I wasn't mad about it but it wasn't disgusting either. And it really does smell funny. Jackfruit was more sticky, stinky and I didn't manage to go back for seconds. But Kathy did. I could see that Terry was trying hard to conceal his disappiontment in me.
To make up for it we offered to take him out for his tea. We enjoyed some real Cambodian dishes like sour soup and monitor lizard in cooked in lemongrass. At least, that is what we think it was.

4 thousand island dressing


Si Phan Don or '4 Thousand Islands' was the last point in our Laos adventure. The islands lie in the middle of the vast Mekong river and on the border with Cambodia. A truly beautiful spot. We settled ourselves on the island of Don Khon. We swam in the Mekong, watched the islanders fish in the midst of fierce Mekong rapids and hired bikes to cruise our way gently around the islands. We stayed comfortably and cheaply with a local family guesthouse who reliably told us that there used to be crime on the island until the military police came and evicted the offending family from the island. Problem solved.
One day we joined some Aussies to cruise on the Mekong to see the rare freshwater Irrawaddy dolphins. Our trip also took us to Cambodia a day earlier than expected, and we celebrated with a can of Angkor beer whilst watching the dolphins frolic about in the distance.

We were very sad to miss the wedding of Kathy's dear friends, Frank and Hayley. Not just because they are amazing and special people but we both knew that it would be a superb party with fantastic music and dancing. In the North of Laos we had gone to sleep with the sky lit up with a thousand dancing fireflies. In the South, on the night of the wedding, we danced on the old French railway bridge under thousands of disco stars and our own full moon glitterball. After a Gay Gordons and karaoke/dance troupe version of 'Blame it on the Boogie', we retired to bed. It was only 10pm but the rest of the island was fast asleep. I'm sure the wedding party was only getting started! We hope you had a great day Frank and Haley - and we wish you all the love and happiness for the future.

Go wild in the country!


Everything happens at a slower pace in Laos. There is no rush to do anything or be anywhere. It is far too hot to zip about like a mad Brit for one thing but it is also not the Laos way. The people really are quite gentle in their manner. Even in the tourist spots like Luang Prabang and Ventiane there was nothing like the hard sell of Chinese business. Tuk tuk drivers would make a plea for your custom in an almost apologetic whisper. The word on everyone's lips is 'sabaidee' - Laos for 'hello' and the ubiquitous mantra welcoming tourists everywhere. We loved Laos but we never felt we dug our nails very deep under its surface. After 'Zee Akha Experience' in the north it was difficult to get a true picture of everyday life outside of the tourist areas. It is a very rural and poor country but at the same time has a wealth of resources we might think of as exotic. Take your pick from pineapples, mango trees, banana trees, dragon fruit and daily fruitshakes made with condensed milk - sometimes with lao lao (Laos rice wine) for more of a cocktail kick to you healthy tonic.
I can't actually remember what we did half of the time. In Luang Prabang we had fun on the cookery course at Tum Tum Cheng restaurant. So called because that is the sound of the drum and cymbal from the Buddhist monastries. We visited the market to find produce and then learned how to make things like sticky rice and fish wrapped and steamed in banana leaves.

At night you would sit and listen to the array of noises in the trees and the gawping "gecko" of the gecko lizard. Kathy loves lizards. She has spent a lot of time admiring, chasing and attempting to catch them. There is a fantastic old photo of Kathy aged about 2 or 3 on her mum's bedroom wall. She is sitting next to a bucket and her eyes are wide open and bright with mischief and fun. When Kathy spots a lizard she has exactly the same look. She pauses, eyes lock on to their target and then she is off, darting after the speedy reptile with both hands scooped infront of her. The fact that she is in the middle of the market surrounded by people and turned 30 years of age does not deter her from her mission.
Laos was also where started having funky dreams from our anti-malarial tablets 'larium'. We take them once a week on a Wednesday and every Wednesday evening we strap our minds in, not sure what awaits us on the other side when we close our eyes. They are vivid, technicolour, full screen hollywood productions that range from action/adventure to sweat drenched horror flicks. Once a week is enough.
When we got to the town of Pakse we decided it was time to break free from the relaxation mould. We hired a moped and headed for the Bolaven plateau, home to coffee plantations and stunning waterfalls. Of course, neither of us had ever ridden a motorbike before. We both like to brag about our dads having had motorbikes as young men (when cool biking references are needed to make up for our own lack of experience). When my mum and dad were 'courting', they used to go around on the motorbike together. But our 100cc Honda scooter wasn't anything like the Norton or Royal Enfield of my dad's days. Downhill at over 50km/hr and you began to feel like you were really motoring, just as boys and girls (aged 8) flew past you screaming 'HELLO!'. The real art to riding a motorbike in Laos is in how many people or goods you can fit onto it. It is not unusual to see as many as 5 people (3 adults, 2 children) perched on the saddle. We managed to fall off only once - skiting across a muddy path at 5km/hr it was nothing serious. But it did get us out into the country and away from the fruitshakes of the tourist trail. We saw some amazing waterfalls, tasted some fresh Arabica Laos coffee and spent the night 80km away from Pakse in one of the cheapest but nicest guesthouses of our time in Laos. After 2 days on the bike, we came back refreshed, invigorated, ordering beerlao instead of fruitshakes (the national beer in Laos is very, very good and has a greater monopoly on the national psyche than our own Tenants lager) and seriously thinking about investing in leathers and Iron Maiden t-shirts when we return to Glasgow. Although, Kathy says she would prefer a pink scooter...

Wednesday 11 June 2008

Big Brother Mouse - books for Laos kids


ATTENTION ALL EDUBLOGGERS! This post is primarily aimed at teachers but I think many of you might be interested in this. Kathy mentioned Big Brother Mouse before in the previous post. It is a fairly new initiative to publish books and deliver books to Laos children, schools and also to adults. We think there is great potential here for schools, teachers, children getting involved to help raise money to publish a book or even (for ambitious types here) to create their own book. We have seen first hand how much local teachers and the community value this service. Our Akha guide kept diving in to the English / Laos dictionary whenever he could. Please take 5 minutes to look over the website. One to think about for after the summer hols. Thanks. www.bigbrothermouse.com

Sunday 8 June 2008

Lao, leeches and men who wear the blouse in this household!

As we approach the border with Laos, and thus begin to experience increasingly hotter and stickier weather conditions, we notice a distinct increase in the amount of creepie-crawlies inhabiting various parts of our hotel and hostel rooms. In this way, I learn that Athole is a total and utter big girl's blouse when it comes to beasties. We are peacefully reading in our twin beds one night when from my right there is a high-pitched shriek and a flurry of movement. When I look round, Athole has hauled the bedclothes up to his neck and is curled up in a ball, eyes wide with fear and horror. The cause of this is a fairly innocent looking cricket, which has strayed out of the bathroom recess it was previously inhabiting and jumped onto Athole's sheet. I dispatch the cricket with a handy flip-flop; Athole breathes again; then he jumps as a large moth flutters past his ear.
So you can imagine the reaction when I casually mention that, in a few days time, we will probably be meeting a few leeches. We spend 20 minutes looking at pictures of leech bites on the internet, by which point, judging by the colour of Athole's face, he wouldn't make a decent meal for any blood-sucking creature.
We have signed up for a 3 day trek through the northern jungle ares of Laos, on a tour of ethnic minority villages. The project running the trip is an ecotourism organisation which ensures that the villages benefit directly from the profits made on the trek - only companies like this are permitted to run tours here - giving local people a direct incentive to preserve their traditions, culture and environment. The blurb and graph charts of how your cash is used at the office are pretty convincing, but if we needed any further reassurance it comes in the form of a French development worker who is running an assessment of the tours for the company and joins our trek, and a Canadian anthropologist following the same trek, but stopping more frequently to do interviews with the villagers. Both approve heartily of the scheme.
When we start the first climb, up a steep hill towards a temple, we have a not-too tough 6 hour walk ahead of us - or so we thought. Our guide makes a few jokes about leeches - hahaha, we all join in. An hour later, we are literally sprinting through sections of the forest as our guide yells "don't stop: if stop too many come!" Leeches are everywhere. And they're not the black, slug-like creatures we'd imagined. These are like vertical worms that sit on the forest floor, practically invisible against the camouflage of leaves and mulch, and then hook on to you as you walk past. The trick is to spot them and flick them off your boots or trouser leg before they work their way inside your clothing and attach themselves to your skin. By the time we stop for lunch at a mercifully leech-free waterfall, we're getting pretty adept at sucker dispatching. But then I scratch the back of my leg and make a gruesome discovery - one of the little bleeders has made its way up my thigh and is happily feasting away - aargh!
In the end, all I am left with was a round, red hole on the back of my leg - not much of a war wound really. But it's a fairly disgusting experience - leeches put an anti-coagulant into your blood, so the bite keeps bleeding even after your guide has scrabbled up your trouser leg and detached the leech. Oh, and leech fear means we complete the trek in half the given time.
The trek is amazing, though hot and sticky all the way through. That's partially because we are lugging extra baggage in the form of books, pens and pencils as gifts for school children in the villages we are visiting. There is an excellent project that's just started work in the last 2 years in Laos, called Big Brother Mouse. It produces and sells bilingual (English and Lao) books for kids and encourages tourists to buy them as presents for people at home or to give to people here as a tip or a gift. Literacy is a real problem in Laos and many children have never owned a book - some have never read one. So we stock up before we leave the main town, and give a parcel of books to each of the villages we eat and sleep in.
Sleeping in the villages is very comfortable - we are housed in specially built lodges, that are similar in design to the traditional wooden houses: there's an open plan interior with simple mattresses on the floor and a fire in the middle of the hut. However, there's a luxury bit at the back with a proper toilet and hot shower - better than some of the guesthouses we've been in. Eating is a slightly different matter. Sticky rice comes with every meal, which is fine, and there's lots of green vegetables, including one that smells - well, frankly, like an eggy fart - before it's cooked but is surprisingly tasty with spicy chicken soup. So far so good on the first day, and we ask our guide lots of questions about all the food people here eat. He tells us about the rice fields and about going frog catching at night. "I'm going tonight!" he cries. "Hahaha," we all laugh. Haven't we learned yet that he's not really joking?
Sure enough, when breakfast appears the next morning, it's frog and eel soup. Not so bad if you stick to the legs and peel the frog (they're boiled whole) but our guide eates them in one go; head first, spitting out the larger bones. Luckily there's a bit of omelette on the side, though we both manage most of a frog.
We're back in the city now - or at least that 's what people in Laos call it. It's got one main street, a market and lots of guesthouses and restaurants, plus a bus station. What more do you need for a city? Athole is delighted.

A nice cup of tea or two...

Okay this is a very daft entry. But when you spend upwards of 17 hours on a train or bus and you have finished your book, your mind (at least my mind) sets itself some daft tasks to carry out!

I love Asterix books and the cover of 'Asterix and Cleopatra' details the ink, paper and beer consumed in the creation of this masterpiece. After over 2 months on the road, this is our own tale of consumption. And the ice-creams are all Kathy's. Honest, guv.



Russia
Trains = 6, metro = 7, planes = 1 ,cars = 2, hovercraft = 1, cups of tea = 89, beer = 12, beds = 8, bottled water = 50, ice-cream = 30, buses = 16
other spirits = whisky, cognac, vodka!!

MONGOLIA
trains = 1, taxis = 3, cups of tea = 15, beer = 20, beds =2, bottled water = 15, ice-cream = 6

CHINA
trains = 5, planes = 1, taxis = 16, cups of tea = 25, beer = 26, beds = 14, bottled water = 60, ice-cream = 26, bikes = 6, buses = 21
other spirits = homemade rice wine, homemade sweetened rice wine, rice wine

Crouching panda, peely wally Scot

CROUCHING PANDA


PEELY WALLY SCOT


China is a country of constant contraditions - there's always someone trying to get you to part with your money, but always someone willing to help too. By the end of our time here we are exhausted by the constant refrain of "Hello! T-shirt? Coke? Postcard? Good price. How much? You say price, you say price!" On the other hand, we have met some amazing people and had countless encounters with Chinese generosity, mainly in the form of free food of one description or another.
A particular highlight is at our guesthouse in Tiger Leaping Gorge, northern Yunnan. The guesthouse is at the start of the famous Gorge trek, which we plan to do, and it makes sense to stay here. It's called "Jane's" and the Lonely Planet describes Jane as "a real character." Fair enough - there's alot of them in China. We are met at the entrance by the campest Chinese guy I've ever seen in my life. He directs us upstairs, where we meet an older woman. She's not Jane. Neither is the younger girl in the kitchen. Then it dawns on us - yes, that was "Jane" at the entrance.
We order dinner, which is totally delicious, and it turns out that Jane does alot of the cooking, so we start asking for tips and recipes. Jane is delighted with this and gives us a tour of the kitchen, telling us how to make sauces and not to buy ready-ground chillies. Then she asks: "Do you know how to make cheesecake?" An hour later, after a quick briefing session on the BBC Food website, I am in the kitchen of a Chinese guesthouse, directing operations for a lemon and strawberry cheesecake. After a bit of improvisation we succed and the result is left in the fridge overnight and served in enormous, complimentary portions for breakfast. It tastes surprisingly good considering the lack of key ingredients and kitchen implements. The only real problem is that I'm not that fond of cheesecake and I've just eaten a giant breakfast in preparation for an all-day trek. But free food cannot be refused in China and I choke it down.

3 is the magic number!

And this time it's a boy!! Congratulations to Kevin, Jess (and Ruby the cat!) on their handsome and very cute baby boy - Finlay Levi Robertson. Kathy and I send all our love and wish you the best health and happiness for the future.
'Finlay Levi Robertson' - what a fantastic name to introduce yourself to the ladies with! That's 3 babies in the Edinburgh area now and counting. They must be adding something to the water round those parts.

I also saved the best example we found of Chinglish especially for you guys. Many signs and instructions make you giggle and chortle in China, but this restaurant sign had Kathy's English lit / post-modernist /deconstructionist mind working overtime. I, on the other hand, thought it made perfect sense. :-)